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Saturday, July 4, 2009

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College Essay Samples - Part 3 of 5

By EssayEdge.com: the Net's Admissions Essay Resource
print, email or bookmark this page Print Version Email this article Bookmark site From Essay Writing 101,
A regular column by Alumbo Staff, Oct 01, 2003          Not rated (click to add your own rating)


Summary:
This five-part article provides samples of three successful college essays, plus comments from the application committee. Included are applications to Stanford, Wellesley, Harvard, Georgetown, and Princeton.
 

 

 

Content provided by EssayEdge's Harvard-Educated Editors.

This is part three of a five-part article:

  1. Stanford Application Essay
  2. Wellesley Application Essay
  3. Harvard Application Essay
  4. Georgetown Application Essay
  5. Princeton Application Essay

Harvard Application

Of all the characters that I’ ve “ met” through books and movies, two stand out as people that I most want to emulate. They are Attacus Finch from To Kill A Mockingbird and Dr. Archibald “ Moonlight” Graham from Field of Dreams. They appeal to me because they embody what I strive to be. They are influential people in small towns who have a direct positive effect on those around them. I, too, plan to live in a small town after graduating from college, and that positive effect is something I must give in order to be satisfied with my life.

Both Mr. Finch and Dr. Graham are strong supporting characters in wonderful stories. They symbolize good, honesty, and wisdom. When the story of my town is written I want to symbolize those things. The base has been formed for me to live a productive, helpful life. As an Eagle Scout I represent those things that Mr. Finch and Dr. Graham represent. In the child/adolescent world I am Mr. Finch and Dr. Graham, but soon I’ ll be entering the adult world, a world in which I’ m not yet prepared to lead.

 
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I’ m quite sure that as teenagers Attacus Finch and Moonlight Graham often wondered what they could do to help others. They probably emulated someone who they had seen live a successful life. They saw someone like my grandfather, 40-year president of our hometown bank, enjoy a lifetime of leading, sharing, and giving. I have seen him spend his Christmas Eves taking gifts of food and joy to indigent families. Often when his bank could not justify a loan to someone in need, my grandfather made the loan from his own pocket. He is a real-life Moonlight Graham, a man who has shown me that characters like Dr. Graham and Mr. Finch do much much more than elicit tears and smiles from readers and movie watchers. Through him and others in my family I feel I have acquired the values and the burning desire to benefit others that will form the foundation for a great life. I also feel that that foundation is not enough. I do not yet have the sophistication, knowledge, and wisdom necessary to succeed as I want to in the adult world. I feel that Harvard, above all others, can guide me toward the life of greatness that will make me the Attacus Finch of my town.

** ADMISSIONS COMMITTEE COMMENTS **

This essay is a great example of how to answer this question well. This applicant chose characters who demonstrated specific traits that reflect on his own personality. We believe that he is sincere about his choices because his reasons are personal (being from a small town, and so forth). He managed to tell us a good deal about himself, his values, and his goals while maintaining a strong focus throughout.

Click here for the free EssayEdge admissions essay help course. Use coupon code 10010101 for 10% off EssayEdge editing.




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